If you build it...

   Sorry, I've been busy and then my computer of  10+ years up and died on me, two blue screens of death and Goodnight Irene... I had it forever,  I replaced the hard drive and operating system twice and put 3 different DVD/CD drives and 2 cooling units in it, so I guess it had enough and went toes up on me. That's cool, it went above and beyond service, I took it out to the backyard and put two bullets in it and put it outta it's misery. I had a back up computer a friend gave me he's gonna hold down the fort until I can get a new one. I really wanna Mac but it's gonna be expensive and i don't have the patience to save the money for it, I want it now!!! , so I guess I 'll get a $500.00 job and soup it up my way!

  It's funny how the computer is more important than the dishwasher or the dryer, Hell one of those goes out and you do the manual thing. But the computer bites it, it's like one of your kids gets pneumonia, you freak out and wonder what the hell your gonna do, I did! I hate that I depend on it for everything! I've been trying to stay away from it at home but "I keep getting pulled back in", Its my photo album, my typewriter, my mail service , my accountant, my reading source, my encyclopedia, my adviser and so much more! Hell to some it's their lover!

  What I really wanna do is build my own computer it'll be a learning experience and fun and allot cheaper, I've always been a Frankenstein kinda guy so I'm gonna look into that too. Is it nerdy that I can do that, nawww no more nerdier that being able to build your own motorcycle or car, just a different format. In fact that is gonna be a long range project too, build my own motorcycle, I have the resources and the talent to help me, even if I don't ride it a lot It would be so cool. But for now I'm gonna concentrate on the computer, Oh yeah and i saw some plans on the web to build an adobe horno oven from scratch, I'm for sure gonna do that this summer, I'll make it for my parents first and if I like it I'll make my own! God gave me the talents to do cool things and lately I haven't been using them, Life's short I don't wanna live with regrets of a least trying! See ya in the backyard and garage...

The Flu had a "Gripa" on me!

Anyone who knows me knows I don't get sick anymore, I used to all the time, three sinus infections a year and at least one cold! I got tired of it and started drinking 3 cups of Green Tea a day and voila... I quit getting sick, Nothing!!! I was cured It was great I was on a six year bender of not getting sick! Well all good things must come to an end or Karma had its way with me. I got the Flu!! Damn it!!! I felt something coming on last week and was like "Nawwww, Im cool, nuttins's wrong just a little allergy from all that nasty dust! JUDO CHOP!!! I was down like a Lead Zeppelin! Man I had forgotten what it was like to be sick, I was woozy, feverish, vomiting and sweating like Nixon!
   I don't know what happened, actually I think I do. I have been really watching my diet lately I cut eating all the crap like sugar and candy, junk food, sodas and started eating better and less! ( I've lost 15lbs so far) I think it was the less that killed me! I should have been taking a multi-vitamin to make up for all the other stuff I was now lacking in (like Ice Cream sandwiches have a ton of vitamins...) anyway my defenses were down and I picked it up from someone or thing and it had its way with me! I was outta it for 5 days when I finally made it to the doctor on the 3rd day she doped me up with anti-biotic (gimme drugs, gimme drugs...) and I stayed home from work for 3 days, It's the most time ever I've taken off of work for sickness! It sucked, all I did was sleep and watch movies.

Men are babies when it comes to being sick, we whine and complain cause we are used to our mommies or wives coming to our rescue (not at my house...), women tend to suck it up and deal with it. I swear to God this is the last time I'm gonna get sick, I'm going to Sam's and am gonna buy one of those jars of vitamins that's bigger than your head and eat them like their frickin' M&M's!!

Your Karma ran over my Dogma

Karma, it used to be one of those things when I was young that I never really gave a second thought to. Maybe I didn't understand what it was , maybe I thought it was another load of crap lesson to make you behave. It wasn't till I was in my 20's that I started to take interest in it. The Bible sez "You reap what you sow" that's easy enuff to understand but I feel Karma is a little deeper. I was brought up to do the right thing, I did most of the time out of  respect and fear of getting in trouble. Doing the right thing is easy when your a kid the consequences are more scary and so you just did it. As I became an adult I saw doing the right thing was not always the best thing and I became a member of the "Nice guys finish last" club. So I became selfish sometimes and did what benefited me allot. That seemed to work for a while and then I started noticing crappy things were happening to me. I didn't like that one bit, I thought to my self "What did I do to deserve this?"

  Of course in my naive selfish mind I tried to relate the bad thing that happened to the situation or person that caused it and not to the fact that I was being a jerk or selfish with other things and this was my payback. It wasn't till then that I discovered Karma and realized that Good becomes Good and Bad Becomes Bad and the return you get from either is never related to the deed itself or the time you receive the Karma back.
  I'm human just like anyone else I have needs, feelings, hopes, desires and most of all emotions. My heart is a fragile one and I'm the first to admit I get my feelings hurt kinda easy. That goes with the territory of me. Most of my friends know this and I get over it right away now. I still ask for it by doing stupid things and have to pay for it in the end. I am now on a mission to right my wrongs though! The say "When you start out on a mission of vengeance, dig two graves" I don't want to end up in one of those graves.
   Some people feel that you can do a bad thing  and if you do a good thing that makes it even. That's not the way it works kiddos! That's self imposed forced Karma which is bad, because the point is you still did a bad thing, you must pay in the end. You must redeem yourself with that person or action. I've been on both ends and it really works. I have friend now that I never thought I could be friends with again but I am. It's because we made our wrongs right and came to a understanding.

 I cant and won't live in a bubble and think I'm immune to all those things and can do whatever I want, You can't, you end up paying for it in the end and in a way you hadn't thought about.

Righting a wrong is a must do in life. It puts you at peace with the situation or person and just makes you feel good.

Anti-Valentines Day...

I wasn't gonna blog about this because I think most people feel the same way about Valentines Day but WTF I'm gonna do it! I F@#$%&G HATE VALENTINES DAY! Yea I said it... It's not that I don't believe you have to show your significant other that you care/Love them, its the fact that there is ONE day to do it! The way I see it if you really love/care for that person you should show them always not that one day! When  I was a young romantic ( I was a charming one too..) I made it a point to always show that person that I loved them not only through my daily actions but I declared my Love for them outright all the time. I remember always reminding them how lucky I was to have that person and that I loved them unconditionally and I meant it... I would watch them sleep, fall in love with the way they danced carelessly, they were the first thing on my mind when I woke up and the last thing on my mind  when I went to sleep. I was proud to walk in the room with them and and other people knew it and could tell I was in love with her...This was not a Honeymoon or first year, this was how I felt always.

   When you love someone you fall into a routine and its easy to get complacent with the "I love you" as the last thing you say on the phone, or the quick kiss goodbye/goodnight, don't get me wrong the effort is there but it seems to take a backseat to life once the "Honeymoon" stage is over with. I'm no expert on this, who is??

   If you really love that person it should be celebrated everyday, you don't gotta be all squishy and mushy. Remind that person why you love them and what they mean to you. Men are horrible at this unless they are in crisis or trouble, but they will do it if they see you making the effort and see it in your eyes. I don't pretend to have all the answers I wish I did but I just see Valentines as a quick "Oh yeah,I Love You" reminder day. I just think that's its lazy or an excuse or Hallmark and Hershey's guilt you into doing it! It's total bullshit that a card, candy and flowers show love! Bye-Bye Hallmark,Hershey's and Flower Shop, find another zombie...

Does it get Colder Than Hell In Hell??

  When did I become such a wuss about the cold??? C'mon I grew up in mostly cold environments, Colorado, Montana, New Mexico, New York, Virginia. These were all places with four seasons. I liked when it snowed I waited for it and welcomed it. It would be colder than day old penguin shit and it didn't bother me! In fact I used to laugh at people who cried about the cold. I remember living in Great Falls Montana when I was about 9-10 years old. It would snow so much there and we would still have to go to school, my Mom would force open the screen door and me and my sister were wrapped up like those Russian nesting dolls, layer after layer of clothing, it added another 30lbs to us and we would trunge our way to school in 4 feet of new snow. God forbid we miss one day of school!! Colorado was like that too, ass cold! My testicles would become ovaries they shrink up so far into me!

  Taos NM was snowy and cold but not that bad at least not for me, I expected it. At 35 degrees people were still having cookouts and walking around in shorts, flannel shirts and sandals. It was a given living there, besides that it was beautiful with the snow on the mountains and on the broken cars in the driveway...

 I think it started when I moved to El Paso in 1991. I kinda got used to the heat living in Las Cruces NM for 7 years so when I moved to EP no big change 2 degrees hotter! My job was primarily outside. I was a TV news photographer so I was always prepared for the weather. I wore shorts 1/3 of the year and loved it. But about five years ago I noticed I got cold easier, WTF!! Really... If you know me you'd say no way he's a big guy (Im working on that BTW...) I got that Native American physic how could I be cold ??? I caught myself always wearing a hoodie in and outdoors, I would sleep with a blanket in the summer, Hell I even wore PJ's-Star Wars ones of course!! Maybe its age, I remember my grandparents would have the heat on so high in the kitchen you would start sweating the moment you walked in. The heat would hit you like you opened an oven door. They were always cold! I hate that I'm like that now, I'm trying to acclimate myself to it all over again, Losing weight has helped too, my circulation has improved alot.I'm trying to wear smaller lighter jackets and not bake everyone in the house.I'll make do here in sunny EP or where ever the Lord puts me ( Albuquerque, I hope..) but  I wanna retire in Belize !!

Stranded at Home

I love a unexpected day off as much as anyone, Well the day-off Gods smiled down on me or laughed and gave me three! Last week El Paso was hit by some freezing ass weather, I mean it was colder than a Mother-in-laws love! Well they cancelled school and my work in a effort to save on power and water, so I was home with the kiddos! I wasn't prepared for this, I had a little food in the house and it was so cold I didn't wanna battle the "Walmarters" so i had to make do. Then to top it off I disconnected my Internet service the day before so I had no Internet, this did not sit well with my kids... My daughters are addicted to pinche Club Penguin, it's like heroin to them! All they do is play that damn game, day in and out it's like their Facebook! They must have asked me 3 million times in the past 5 days "When are we getting the Internet back" I finally started telling them "Never!!!" Then the tears started... Well I put out that fire by taking them to the library on Saturday and they got their fix but still complained it wasn't enough time!

   Then meals were the drama... I forget what it was like to be a kid sometimes even though I act like one half the time! They are always hungry! Always!!! When i was young I made do as a latchkey kid with cheese and crackers and cherry Kool-aid! I was too busy playing and scheming to take over the world... Well my monsters were stuck inside and I guess the cold made them hungry so they proceeded to place their orders. Well I was cooking like an Italian Grandmother! I made Soup, Chili, Stew, Pizza you name it I made it. I let them deal with the snack end and all was good, I did have to brave Walmart though which was full of panicky shoppers acting like the Apocalypse was coming. All the Twinkies were gone...

All and all it was a good time, I got to spend some time with my kids where they had no distractions outside of the TV. I taught my daughters how to play Blackjack and then they proceeded to kick my ass in it. I watched a good documentary with my son called "Waking Sleeping Beauty" about recent Disney animation. We watched movies and hung out, I cleaned my "Hoarders" computer desk, there was so much crap on it I would have won everything on "Lets Make a Deal" !

   The Internet comes back on Wednesday so everything will be back to normal, Ignore Dad, Complain to Dad, Order Dad around.. Oh well at least they know I'm in the room!